Two blondes were driving along a road by a wheat field.
They saw a blonde in the middle of the field rowing a rowboat.
The blonde driver turned to her friend and said, “You know, it’s blondes like that that give us a bad name!”
To this, the other blonde replied, “I know it! And if I knew how to swim, I’d go out there and save her.”
The psychology instructor had just finished a lecture on mental health. He proceeded to give an oral quiz to the freshman class. Speaking specifically about manic depression, the instructor asked, “How would you diagnose a patient who walks back and forth screaming at the top of his lungs one minute then sits in a chair…
You know that all potatoes have eyes. Well, Mr. and Mrs. Potato had eyes for each other and finally got married. They had a little one, a real SWEET POTATO, whom they called “YAM.” They wanted the best for little YAM, telling her all about the facts of life. They warned her about going out…
A young blonde woman is distraught because she fears her husband is having an affair. She goes to a gun shop and buys a handgun. The next day, she comes home to find her husband in bed with a beautiful redhead. She grabs the gun and holds it to her own head. The husband jumps…
There’s this guy who has been stranded on a deserted island all alone for 10 years. One day, he sees an unusual speck on the horizon. “It’s certainly not a ship,” he thinks to himself. As the speck gets closer and closer, he begins to rule out the possibilities of a small boat, then even…
There once was a blind man who decided to visit Texas. When he got on the plane, he felt the seats and said, “Wow! These seats are big!” The person next to him answered, “Everything is big in Texas.” When he finally arrived in Texas, he decided to visit a bar. Upon arriving at the…
Morris and his wife, Esther, went to the state fair every year. And every year, Morris would say, “Esther, I’d like to ride in that helicopter.” Esther always replied, “I know, Morris, but that helicopter ride is fifty dollars, and fifty dollars is fifty dollars.” One year Esther and Morris went to the fair, and…