Stranded on an Island

There’s this guy who has been stranded on a deserted island all alone for 10 years.

One day, he sees an unusual speck on the horizon.

“It’s certainly not a ship,” he thinks to himself.

As the speck gets closer and closer, he begins to rule out the possibilities of a small boat, then even a raft.

Suddenly, emerging from the surf, comes this drop-dead gorgeous blonde woman wearing a wet suit and scuba gear.

She approaches the stunned guy and asks, “How long has it been since you’ve had a cigarette?”

“Ten years!” he says.

She reaches over, unzips a waterproof pocket on her sleeve, and pulls out a packet of cigarettes.

He takes one, lights it, takes a long drag, and says, “Man, oh man, is that ever good!”

She then asked him, “How long has it been since you’ve had a sip of bourbon?”

Trembling, he replies, “Ten years!”

She reaches over, pulls out a flask, and gives it to him.

He opens the flask, takes a long swig, and says, “Wow! That’s absolutely fantastic.”

Then she starts slowly unzipping the long zipper that runs down the front of her wet suit.

She looks at him seductively and asks, “How long has it been since you’ve played around?”

The guy, with tears in his eyes, replies, “Oh sweet Lord God! Don’t tell me you’ve got golf clubs in there!”

Similar Posts

  • The Elevator

    An Amish boy and his father were in a mall. They were amazed by most everything they saw. Especially by two shiny, silver walls that would move apart and then slide back together again. The boy asked, “What is this, father?” The father, never having seen an elevator, responded, “Son, I have never seen anything…

  • Row Your Boat

    Two blondes were driving along a road by a wheat field. They saw a blonde in the middle of the field rowing a rowboat. The blonde driver turned to her friend and said, “You know, it’s blondes like that that give us a bad name!” To this, the other blonde replied, “I know it! And…

  • The Email Mix Up

    Mr. Earl Johnson, a businessman from Madison, Wisconsin, went on a business trip to New Orleans, Louisiana. He immediately sent an email back home to his wife, Jennifer. Unfortunately, he forgot his wife’s exact email address. He got the email address mixed up. He ended up sending it to Mrs. Joan Johnson of Newark, New…

  • The Helicopter Ride

    Morris and his wife, Esther, went to the state fair every year. And every year, Morris would say, “Esther, I’d like to ride in that helicopter.” Esther always replied, “I know, Morris, but that helicopter ride is fifty dollars, and fifty dollars is fifty dollars.” One year Esther and Morris went to the fair, and…

  • The Seaman and the Pirate

    An able-bodied seaman meets a pirate in a bar, and they take turns recounting their adventures at sea. Noting the pirate’s peg-leg, hook, and eye patch, the seaman asks, “So, how did you end up with the peg-leg?” The pirate replies, “We was caught in a monster storm off the cape, and a giant wave…